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Chapter 21. Understanding Self-Sabotage > The Stages of Self-Sabotage

The Stages of Self-Sabotage

In most human-relations conflicts, you either work to repair relationships or you avoid the conflict and sabotage yourself. Once conflict avoidance begins, often both parties become increasingly involved in an emotional/psychological process that accelerates into higher and more damaging stages. The self-sabotage process has three stages:

Stage 1: Surface damage with low hurt involvement within individuals. The prospects for healing are excellent if either party takes immediate action.
Stage 2: Deeper damage to the relationship. Emotional hurt may be more serious within one individual than the other. Healing becomes more difficult. One or both parties may feel deep hurt.
Stage 3: Emotional/psychological conflict is severe. Both parties are often hurt. Healing often depends on the willingness of both parties to communicate openly. Professional counseling may be needed.



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