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Part: IV People Who Ask Too Much > When Help Turns into Help!!!—Get Me Out of T...

Chapter 26. When Help Turns into Help!!!—Get Me Out of This

Sometimes the help that seems so useful can turn into more of a hindrance when someone tries to help too much. Then, rather than being helped and guided, you can feel controlled and led. The process can occur very gradually, and the path from help to hell can be paved with good intentions. But the net result is you end up feeling trapped and just want to get away. The trap seems so enticing in the beginning— you feel like you're getting a great tasting treat. However, in time, the helper turns into the hunter and you become their prey.

That's what happened to Marvin after he joined a company's training department. He began working on developing a training program for the customer service department, which had recently set up a call center with customer service reps in different areas of the country. His job was to create an online series of classes that these reps could access to learn what to do. His supervisor, Ann, provided his initial instruction on how to write these programs, which combined descriptions of techniques with role-play practice and take-it-yourself quizzes to see how you're doing. She then left him a detailed instruction manual, before flying across the country to work with other program developers at another office. Thus, Marvin was left pretty much on his own with the deadline she gave him, and as he wrote up his ideas for what to include in the program, he felt increasingly lost. Though he knew how to write, he didn't know what to say, since he was unfamiliar with call centers and the detailed manual only made him feel more confused. He wasn't sure what was important to feature and how to set up the role plays and quizzes.


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