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Chapter 23. We're All Difficult Sometime... > Some Difficulty Indicators - Pg. 246

We're All Difficult Sometimes--Are You Difficult oo Much? 246 Another reason to take a look at yourself: People who are unaware of how their bosses perceive them can end up in very difficult situations and certainly negatively affect their own careers. A lot of promotion decisions are based on how you appear to people, particularly upper management. Yes, it does matter that you do a good job, but if you come across as an ill-mannered bore, a bull in the china shop, and so on, your career prospects are usually reduced. Even if you're a really good person but have a gruff, trouble-follows-you-anywhere exterior, you're limiting yourself. So we have three good reasons why it's important to try to understand how others view you and to work at reducing your own difficult behavior. Some Difficulty Indicators What kinds of cues can you use to see yourself through the eyes of other people? Are there things to look out for that might tell you something about your own difficult behaviors? Yes. If you want to increase your sense of how other people see you, you need to pay attention to other people and how they behave with you. This isn't an exact science, but if you start observing the reactions of others, you can get some idea of how they perceive you. There are a few different sets of people to consider: your employees, your boss, your coworkers, and your personal acquaintan- ces. In general, regardless of the category of people, you need to notice the patterns of interaction you have with others. Let's start with a list of patterns. If a number of the following items apply to you over time and across groups of people, then you may be considered overly difficult: · Are you often caught up in arguments, disputes, and disagreements, even when it doesn't seem to make sense? · Are you someone who manages from crisis to crisis?