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Chapter 7. Marriage: The Test of Time > Infidelity: The Cheating Heart

Infidelity: The Cheating Heart

Infidelity is a painful event in any marriage and in a league all its own when it comes to the turmoil, mistrust, and resentment it provokes. Those who have gone through it describe it as one of the most agonizing experiences of their life.

For years researchers have tried to get accurate statistics on infidelity in a marriage. Some experts estimate that 60 percent of husbands and 40 percent of wives will have an affair during their marriage (The Monogamy Myth by Peggy Vaughn). The ironic thing is that people tend to be less than totally honest on this subject for two contradictory reasons. The first reason is shame and guilt. The experience has been so excruciating that even if it's an anonymous poll, the individual still won't acknowledge it. It is more comfortable and less dishonorable to deny the whole thing. On the other hand, there are those who like to “talk the talk” and exaggerate about his or her conquests. Apparently, embellishing the truth makes them feel more powerful or attractive.


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