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Chapter 6. Present Yourself > Engage Your Partner

Engage Your Partner

You have the power to use your body language to reward and encourage your partner in conversation. On the classic TV show Star Trek (all the versions), the captain of the Enterprise always ends the show by saying, "Engage." That word indicates that the Starship is underway again, off to new adventures. The letters in that word can help you remember how to give a positive message through your body language as you engage in conversation.

E = establishing eye contact. You don't actually have to look at the other person's eyes. If you're looking at any part of your partner's face, she will feel that you are looking at her. In our culture, it feels comfortable to break eye contact every seven or eight seconds or so. Glance away and then back. It's more flattering to your partner to glance down to the side and then move your eyes back to your partner's face rather than glancing over your partner's shoulder, as if you are looking for someone else to talk with.


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