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I Don’t Want to

When you get caught up in a win-lose proposition, the game becomes achieving what is good just for you—not the group as a whole. This philosophy of win-lose affects your interaction with others, your level of honesty in the discussion and your willingness to listen to another point of view. You are so busy figuring out how to get the group to adopt your position that you cannot work as part of the group. Many aspects of society are based on competition, so it is natural that this attitude would spill over into your own behavior and that of your group members. The best path is to advocate consensus (win-win) up front. If it appears that members of the group are competing (win-lose), get this issue on the table and address it.


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