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Stage II—Anger

“Why me?!” “It’s not fair!” “Why now, after all these years?!” “How could they do this to (me)(him)(her)?!” “I hate them for this!” Rage, resentment, bitterness, sabotage and violence can result from the anger phase of loss and grief. When you have something or someone and you lose what you had, a primitive anger is the result. Anger, too, is an expected part of the grieving process. People are not bad or wrong for feeling angry. What can be bad or wrong is what is done with the anger.

Anger due to loss or threat of loss can be displaced to someone or something other than the source of the anger. When a loved one dies or receives a life-threatening diagnosis, the anger may be directed toward a Higher Being, a medical staff, the government or anyone else. Loss in the workplace can bring about the dumping of anger on the old management, the new management, co-workers, family or even the family pet.


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