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What Is Emotional Intelligence? > THE EQ FRAMEWORK


The information contained within these pages concentrates on developing some, but not all, aspects of emotional intelligence. (It is impossible for any 50 activities to ever effectively address the whole of this subject.) The exercises contained within these pages are aimed mostly at developing the following set of talents:

  1. Self-Awareness and Control— This talent comprises two separate skills. The self-awareness component demands intimate and accurate knowledge of one's self and one's emotions. It also demands understanding and predicting one's emotional reactions to situations. One who is emotionally competent at self-awareness is also fully aware of one's values and core beliefs and knows the impact and effect of compromising these core components. The self-control component requires full mastery of being in control of one's emotions. Both positive and negative emotions are channeled in the most productive manner when one controls the emotion versus having the emotion control the person. The person with mastery and control of emotions can both anticipate and plan emotional reactions to maximize effectiveness.

  2. Empathy— Empathy requires the ability to understand how others perceive situations. This perception includes knowing how others feel about a particular set of events or circumstances. Empathy requires knowing the perspective of others and being very able to see things from the value and belief system of the other person. It is the ability to fully immerse oneself in another's viewpoint, yet be able to remain wholly apart. The understanding associated with empathy is both cognitive and emotional. It takes into consideration the reasons and logic behind another's feelings or point of view, while also allowing the empathic party to feel the spirit of a person or thing.

  3. Social Expertness— Social expertness is the ability to build genuine relationships and bonds with others that are based on an assumption of human equality. It allows people to genuinely express feelings, even conflict, in a way that builds rather than destroys relationships. Social expertness also enables a person to choose appropriate actions based on his or her feelings of empathy. The talent of social expertness allows caring, support, and concern to show for fellow humans in all of life's situations. Social expertness also demands that one read social situations for readiness, appropriateness, and spoken and unspoken norms. Resolving conflict without compromising core beliefs or values is an important component of social expertness. High social expertness also allows for strong networks on both a professional and personal level that can be enlisted readily when needed for aid.

  4. Personal Influence— Personal influence is the ability to inspire others through example, words, and deeds. It is the ability to lead others by way of social expertness. Personal influence is the ability to read situations and exert influence and leadership in the desired direction. It is also the ability to confront issues that are important or debilitating to relationships, goals, missions, or visions. Personal influence is, in addition, exhibiting motivation for one's visions, missions, core values, and beliefs.

  5. Mastery of Vision— Mastery of vision requires that the individual has the ability to set direction and vision guided by a strong personal philosophy. The ability to communicate and articulate with passion regarding direction and vision are also essential to mastery of vision. This talent serves as the inner compass that guides and influences one's actions. This inner compass also provides resilience and strength to overcome obstacles. It is the inner motivator and the guardian angel of our purpose. Mastery of vision allows us to know who we are and what we are compelled to do with our lives. When our actions and words are consistent with this personal philosophy, it is our sense of authenticity. When inconsistent, it is our sense of stress and discomfort.



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