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Chapter 4. The Dirty Dozen: More Down & Dirty Tricks

Chapter 4. The Dirty Dozen: More Down & Dirty Tricks

I have to 'fess up. There aren't really a dozen special effects in this chapter. The real name of this chapter is “More Down & Dirty Tricks” (which is what this chapter is). The “Dirty Dozen” thing is more like a slogan. I only used it because my editor told me if I found a way to work the word “Dirty” into a chapter title, according to research it would increase sales of the book by as much as 16% (18% in some parts of New Jersey). Hey, I can't argue with him, because in my last book he told me to slip in the word “Naughty” somewhere and it increased sales by over 19%, despite the fact that the chapter was then awkwardly named “Naughty CMYK Prepress Settings.” He also said if I casually noted that I know Britney Spears personally (which I do not), it would open a whole new teen market for my books. And if I could somehow slip the words “Tom Clancy” onto the front cover of the book, in all caps, at a large point size, sales would really take off. So far, it's working. Well, gotta run—my next Harry Potter book isn't just going to write itself, ya know.


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